


Desperate to Sleep

by silverjewelkitten



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Smut, PWP
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-13 21:56:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14121660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silverjewelkitten/pseuds/silverjewelkitten
Summary: Rey dreams of Jakku, and wakes with aching loneliness.





	Desperate to Sleep

She gasps herself awake, heart racing in her chest, the phantom tinge of some dark dream lingering on her half-conscious mind. Her waiting has left its scars. Memories that seep into nightmares--hopes that wash away down the basin as she cleans her face, eyes crusted with sleep. Growing up alone, with a singular purpose to scavenge for parts in heaps of space trash—metal baked to scorching in the desert sun. Jakku is only a memory now. And memories haunt. 

She thinks to the loneliness of the night, her child self curled into a ball, burying her legs in the sand for warmth. The desert winds can alternate between hot enough to blister and cold enough to freeze, if left uninhibited. 

Since her departure, she’d been given luxuries never before known—regular meals, a bed too soft for sleeping, and the warm, inviting company of friends. Yet the dreams persisted. 

As she returns to her bed, the force shifts, and her ears fill with static. Like on Crait, she wants to shut him out, but upon seeing the hardened lines of his sleeping face, she can’t find the strength to do so. 

At night, desperate to sleep. She thinks to the island and it’s welcoming call, the beckoning of the cave, the tree, and the wholeness she felt therein. They’d connected there, felt the force resonate, and had found a sense of belonging. And her loneliness was lessened. He’d made his choice, as she had made her own, but somehow, the hope that he can turn has not left her heart. 

Breathing deeply, she goes to his side, the bed bowing beneath her weight. He shifts restlessly beside her. She brushes the hair back from his eyes, gentle as breath. His brow furrows and then relaxes. She hesitates to pull away, but does so, reluctantly. He curls towards her, chasing her touch. A twinge of sadness tugs at her chest, and she reaches to touch him again, firmer this time, more assured. Her fingers trail down his jaw reverently, admiring the curve of it. Her thumb traces his bottom lip, feeling his soft exhale of breath. Her eyes follow the shape of him, spying his bare torso beneath her own sheets. 

She stops her wandering, feeling like a voyeur, or an unwanted presence come to steal his dreams. But still her hand lingers, posed to touch him again. Here where he is most vulnerable, she feels like an intruder. Even though he’s in her bed (and she may very well be in his). 

He’s here but he isn’t, and will likely never be. She bites her lip and shivers silently as the first of her tears falls. If she wakes him, she can no longer tenderly watch over him. But even if he rejects her, casts her out, she doesn’t want to be alone. He’s seen her face wet with tears before, and she feels no shame if he sees them again. “Ben.”

He startles awake, eyes already calculating an escape. She sniffles quietly, and pulls her hand away from him. She could scare him away. She doesn’t seek to cage him if he wants to flee. Coming back to himself, his eyes soften. Without words, she lies alongside him. He studies her, eyes drifting to her quivering lip. “Did something happen?” She shakes her head.

“I don’t want to be alone.” Wordlessly he cups her face in his hand, thumbing at the tear tracks on her cheek. His mouth purses and he slides closer to her, his forehead pressing against hers in the dark. 

“I’m with you.” The force coils around them, warm and safe. She presses her lips to his experimentally, stowing the gasp he makes away in her mind for safekeeping. As inexperienced as she is, the kiss is short-lived and chaste. His eyes are nearly closed as she pulls back. He looks bewildered and amazed, his jaw slack and his mouth parted. The dark is full of temptation, and she gives in. 

She doesn’t have much of a frame of reference for what it’s supposed to be like, but his mouth is soft, and she dives back in again and again, savoring him. He kisses back languidly, his tongue darting out to meet hers. They learn together and feed off of each other. 

A new kind of heat pools in her belly as his hands tangle in her hair, tugging enough to sting, but never to hurt. The force is a gentle rumble in the back of her mind. She wants to taste him everywhere, like it’s instinctual to come together in this way. “Ben.” She murmurs against his jaw, mouth at his neck, her tongue laving down to his collarbones. She feels more than hears him moan her name back, mouth on his Adam’s apple, feeling it bob as he swallows deeply. She rolls on top of him, hands already tugging at her own wrappings. 

His hands clutch at her hips and he ruts up against her, gasping. His fingers slide up her stomach and meet hers at her top, aiding her as she pulls the last layer of it up and off her chest. Her breasts fall free, and he grasps them in his large hands, thumbs running across the hardening peaks of her nipples. “Beautiful.” He says, as she leans into his hands, mouth opening on a whine. The hardening length of him presses insistently against her thighs as she straddles him. 

She braces her hands on his bare chest and rubs herself against him, earning a soft groan in response. Surely his body is made for exactly this. She leans down to kiss him again, messier this time, and his hands slide down to her hips again, squeezing and relaxing as she grinds into his lap. He starts to breathe faster, hold her tighter, and thrust against her more urgently. She pushes away from him and he looks terrified, like he’s offended her in some way and now she’s going to close the bond. 

“Rey?” He questions, beginning to sit up, but then she’s pressing a finger against his lips and sliding her hand down his stomach slowly, torturously. His eyes widen with understanding and he nods, as her hand finally, finally dips beneath the waistband of his sleep pants and grips at his cock. The pressure is better this way, and he twitches in her hand, already close as it is.  
She looks him in his eyes the whole time, mouth panting from her exertion, breasts swinging lightly as she moves. She looks stunning in the low light, and her fingers grasp him just tightly enough to set him aflame. “Is this okay?” Am I good enough? She asks, biting her lip. He almost laughs, but chokes it back on a moan as she rubs her thumb along the tip of him, spreading beads of his spend across the swollen head. “Fuck.” His head falls back and he thrusts into her hand. “Yeah. Like that.”

She watches him, enraptured, as she strokes faster. He opens his mouth to encourage her, but ends up hissing instead. He feels it building, the pressure behind his eyes, the impending climax rushing towards him. “Rey, I’m gonna-“ She squeezes his cock and her free hand traces up his stomach, gripping hard enough to bruise. 

She meets his eyes again and licks her lips, and it sends him tumbling over the edge. He shoots hot into her hand, sullying his pants with come like he had as a teenager, fumbling alone in the dark. 

He closes his eyes and breathes through his nose, trying to regain his composure. When he opens them again, she’s staring at him curiously. “Come here.” He says, not quite a demand but not a request either. 

She crawls up towards him and he pulls her into a kiss, sucking her tongue into his mouth greedily. This time he rolls her onto her back, his tongue making paths down her body, peppering attention wherever strikes his fancy. Her small breasts heave with her breaths and he kneads at them gently as he slips his tongue down her navel. She shivers, leaning up as he nuzzles further and further down. 

His head lifts immediately, like he’s ashamed, “Do you want me to stop?” She shakes her head and cards her fingers into his hair. His hand grips at the inside of her thigh and caresses at the soft flesh. He’s never touched a woman like this before. He’s lost as to where to go from here, but is overwhelmed with the need to touch and taste. His fingers rub against the damp place between her thighs, covered with the fabric of her shorts. 

Rey shimmies them down her legs, giving him access to the slippery heat of her cunt. His mouth finds purchase on the soft mound of her, making his way down, breathing in the scent of her arousal. She thrashes about, a cry in her throat. She brings a fist to her mouth when his tongue slips down between her folds. She trembles against his lips. “Ben.” She moans. He feels his cock twitch at the mention of his name, her voice hitched high in pleasure. 

She soaks his chin, rubbing herself against his face, blindly seeking her own release. He sucks at the nub at the top of her, eliciting a near scream from her, her legs twisting around his shoulders. He could taste her forever, but her climax barrels towards him quickly, her hands squeezing at his hair and her thighs clenching around his head. “Keep going.” He does as she asks, his hand curling around her thigh now, working circles into her skin, as his tongue laps into her. Her clit throbs into his mouth and her hips surge up against him when she comes. “Ahh.” She whines, eyes screwing shut, toes curling against his back. 

He struggles to breathe, cradled between her thighs as she rides out her orgasm. Eventually she flops back, legs going shaky and limp beside her. He gulps in a breath and licks the taste of her off his mouth, using a hand to wipe at the parts he can’t reach with his tongue. “Good?” He asks, already moving up her body to lay beside her. 

She cracks open an eye, chest heaving. “Mmhm.” They’re both tired, and the aching loneliness has faded to a dull whisper. She turns into the circle of his arms and buries her head into his chest. 

If the force should separate them in the night, at least they’ll have this moment of togetherness to get them through the lonely nights to come. Warm and sated, Rey falls asleep against his body. Ben’s hands grasp her tightly, and he follows after her. 

Their dreams are blessedly silent.


End file.
